I read an article a few months ago in Spirituality and Health titled MAKE A CLEAN BREAK FROM ANXIETY by Cash Peters.   Being a life-long scaredy cat, I was intrigued.   Since my mother-in-law’s diagnosis with kidney failure in 2006, anxiety has been a constant companion.   I think anyone who has had a family member in and out of the emergency room for any period of time knows the feeling.   Though Wilma, the MIL, is still is on dialysis with many other complications, our life has stabilized.   Wilma now has been grilled on calling 911 and on not waiting at the gate herself for the paramedics.  Still, I had to learn to shake off the constant worry of what if . . . and move on with my life to the best of my abilities considering Wilma now lives half a mile away.

Finding out I had hypothyroidism in December helped me get some of my energy back, but it didn’t conquer the fear of what all I had ignored for the last few years.   I felt completely cut off from my old life and wanted it back.   I didn’t even know how to use Facebook but understood I needed a web presence to get my writing career revived.   Technology scares me.  It always has.  Lots of things have always scared me.   Like horses and riding in small planes, especially ones without motors.  My husband has a sail plane and flying is his passion.   He’s taken people up with him but I just can’t bring myself to do it.  It’s not that I don’t trust him, it’s just that we both know I’ll white knuckle it and throw up.   Luckily, after close to a couple of decades together, he’s come to realize, I’d really just rather read a book.

Unfortunately, I realized I was going into my shell too much and needed to try some new things.  While looking for a WordPress class to start a blog, I found Wordcamp which was having their first camp in San Diego.   I signed up but by the time came last Saturday everything I had tried to glean from tutorials and just pushing buttons left me completely.   The information there was phenomenal and very smart people were very helpful.  I left with a splitting headache that lasted half the week, but with the courage to keep trying to create a unique blog.

So far it took me all morning just to crop the picture you see in the header.  It’s not exactly what I wanted and will probably be changed but at least it is there.  And I’m learning to use the camera I bought before the Wordcamp.   Here is what was waiting for me when I got home last Saturday:

These two would rather I stay in my comfort zone on the open spot of their couch.  Clearly this should be cropped more, but I’m lucky to be able to upload it from my computer.   So back to the article about how to make a clean break from anxiety.   The author decided to say Yes to anything he was asked to do over the next twelve months.   And that’s how I found myself at Wordcamp last Saturday.   I still have no intentions of riding in my husband’s sail plane however.